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120 Deep Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend

List of 120 deep questions to ask your girlfriend that will help you jumpstart the talking, help you understand her, and deepen your relationship with her. Read more ⇣
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Written By Erica
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I'm Erica. I love to help people in their relationships and spiritual lives. I've been through a lot of ups and downs, and I want to share my insights with you.
Deep Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend

When it comes to dating, it’s easy to get caught up in the moment. You’re meeting someone new, and you want to make a good impression.

But this isn’t about your next date, it’s about getting to know your partner on a deeper level. And that takes some thoughtfulness on your part.

But don’t worry — there are ways to ask these questions without making your partner uncomfortable or sounding like you’re interrogating them.

120 deep questions to ask your girlfriend that will help you jumpstart the talking, help you understand her, and deepen your relationship with her

I’ve come up with 120 deep questions to ask your girlfriend for your next date night. This should help you deepen the intimacy and depth of your relationship. 

120 Deep Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend

  1. Who are you closest to in your family?
  2. If you had to describe yourself using only three words, what would you choose?
  3. What’s one thing in your life that you used to do all the time that you don’t do as often now?
  4. When was a time when things didn’t go as planned? How did you deal with the situation?
  5. What are your views on a relationship?
  6. Tell me about two of your best friends, and why they are your best friends.
  7. Tell me about two of your closest friends, and how you met.
  8. How do you make decisions in life?
  9. What did you learn from your parents or other important people in your life?
  10. If money wasn’t an issue, what would be the first thing you would buy if you won the lottery?
  11. Tell me about your best childhood memory.
  12. What was the first thing that came to your mind the first time you met me?
  13. What would your perfect day look like?
  14. What do you hope will happen in the next five years of your life? Ten years?
  15. What is one lesson from failure that has stuck with you throughout your life and how did it make you better?
  16. How do you feel about sharing your password with your partner?
  17. Which can be worse in your opinion – Physical pain or emotional pain?
  18. If I asked you at age 5 what you wanted to be when you grow up, what would you say?
  19. Would you relocate for love?
  20. What is the most important thing in a relationship?
  21. How did your last relationship end?
  22. How would you feel if your partner told you they needed space?
  23. Do you believe that people deserve second chances, or do they use those up at some point?
  24. What’s a story you’ve always wanted to tell, but never got a chance to?
  25. Is there something you could cut out of your life with little effort that would save you tons of money?
  26. What values and morals do you perceive as deal breakers in a relationship?
  27. Have you ever been in an emotionally or mentally abusive relationship before?
  28. What scares you most about our relationship?
  29. What is an innocent mistake you made that had dramatic consequences?
  30. What was the hardest thing that you ever had to get through as a kid?
  31. If you could go back in time, which events would you change and why?
  32. Were you happy in the childhood that you grew up in?
  33. Why are you passionate about the things you’re passionate about?
  34. On a really bad day, what drives you to get out of bed?
  35. Looking back on your life, what have you done that has given you the most satisfaction?
  36. What do you think was your most vulnerable moment in our relationship?
  37. At the end of your life, what would you want people to see you as?
  38. Do you believe in God or have any spiritual beliefs?
  39. Would your younger self be proud of what you’ve achieved so far?
  40. What is one thing about your parents’ relationship that you seek to emulate?
  41. What is one thing you think makes our relationship unique from everyone else’s?
  42. What do you believe to be an ideal relationship?
  43. If you could hear every time someone said something good about you or something negative about you, which would you choose?
  44. What do you think people automatically assume about you when they look at you?
  45. Would you rather be loved with words or actions?
  46. What difficult experience changed you the most?
  47. What is something terrible humans do that you wish you could change?
  48. What is something you’ve always been insecure about?
  49. What would you do if one day you woke up and you were the last person on Earth?
  50. What do you do to take care of yourself?
  51. What is your personal definition of love?
  52. Do you believe that there is a soul mate out there for everyone?
  53. Is work-life balance important to you?
  54. If you were to choose between love and career at gunpoint, what would you choose and why?
  55. If there was one major change you could make in your life right now, what would it be and why?
  56. Would you rather have a life full of happiness or a life full of wealth?
  57. Have you ever gone long periods of time without saying “I love you” to anyone and how did it make you feel?
  58. What is the greatest thing someone has ever done for you (not including family members)?
  59. If you were to die tomorrow, what would you want to do tonight?
  60. What experience made you never want to feel love ever again?
  61. What do you think makes a long-lasting relationship or marriage?
  62. Are you afraid of dying? If yes, what scares you about it?
  63. What’s one thing that absolutely disgusts you about yourself and why can’t you get rid of it?
  64. What’s that one thing that people always misunderstand about you?
  65. How comfortable are you opening up to me about your past and emotions in general?
  66. If you could spend a day with someone who has passed away, who would it be?
  67. When was the last time you cried and why did it happen?
  68. What are your comfort zones, and how do they limit you?
  69. Is there a career dream that you gave up on, and why did you give it up?
  70. If a genie granted you three wishes right now, what would you wish for?
  71. If you could be born again, would you choose to be a different sex to what you are?
  72. What does it mean to be human?
  73. Have you discovered your purpose in life?
  74. Do you believe that God made everything in this world or that we were created through science?
  75. How do you know when it is time to break up with someone?
  76. Do you believe in long-distance relationships, or in relationships between two people of different cultures and backgrounds?
  77. What is the one thing you would never admit to anyone to look weak or vulnerable?
  78. Do you have a bad habit that you know you need to break but just can’t seem to quit?
  79. Would you be friends with someone even if they didn’t like themselves very much?
  80. What would trigger you to break off a friendship, even if you’ve been friends for a decade?
  81. Do you think past matters in a relationship?
  82. What is the most romantic thing someone has done for you?
  83. When do you feel appreciated, recognized, and loved?
  84. What’s something you do that’s wild and crazy that you want to try with me?
  85. In the past week, what are you most grateful for in this relationship?
  86. What in this relationship has been hard for you to deal with?
  87. What in past relationships has been hard to deal with?
  88. What makes you feel suffocated and out of control?
  89. Do you think love language matters and why or why not?
  90. When was the first time you said “I love you” to someone in your life other than your family?
  91. Describe the most romantic date you can think of — spare no expense!
  92. Where would you go if a zombie apocalypse happened right this second?
  93. When people come to you for help, what do they usually want help with?
  94. What’s one thing that’s happened to you that has made you a stronger person?
  95. What’s one thing that’s happened to you in your life that made you feel weak?
  96. What was the worst phase you went through and how did you get over it?
  97. What is your biggest fear and how did it develop?
  98. Do you think past relationships should be left in the past, or does everyone deserve a second chance?
  99. How do you feel about death?
  100. Is there a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone?
  101. What was the moment you knew this relationship could get serious?
  102. Do you ever think about marriage or children in the future?
  103. Would you rather be with someone who loves you a lot but you don’t love as much or someone who loves you just as much but that you love more?
  104. What’s something that happened that should have made you cry, but didn’t?
  105. Of all the things that people do wrong to you, which one is the hardest for you to forgive?
  106. If only one person could know the real you, who would it be and why them?
  107. Would you rather acquire material items or experiences?
  108. What is the most important lesson to teach a child?
  109. How have your values changed from ten years ago?
  110. Do you put as much effort and emphasis on inner beauty as outer beauty?
  111. Who in your family do you view as a role model?
  112. What thought or object gets you through the day?
  113. Is failing less, equal, or more important than succeeding?
  114. Do you think opposite genders can maintain a friendship without developing a love interest?
  115. How often should a couple argue or fight to maintain a healthy relationship?
  116. Is there anything that gives you overwhelming anxiety?
  117. Have you ever suffered from mental health and how did you deal with it?
  118. Do you have any irrational fears?
  119. How do you deal with overthinking?
  120. Is there any part of my personality that you’re not a fan of, or that conflicts with yours?


Questions are a great way to get to know someone better. But if you ask the same old questions, your girlfriend is going to get bored.

That’s why it’s important to ask deep questions to your girlfriend that go beyond the surface.

The deeper the question, the more likely she’ll be interested in answering it and telling you more about herself. 

And by getting her to open up, you’ll learn more about what makes her tick and what makes her happy — which is exactly what you need to know when trying to understand how to make her feel loved.

Check out my list of deep questions to ask your boyfriend here

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